there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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