mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
