he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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