i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
