Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
