I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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