This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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