Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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