I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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