from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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