I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
