Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize