Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
