I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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