Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
