I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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