Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
