Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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