I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Randomize
