my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
