I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
