It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
