at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I am puke
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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