Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize