He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Randomize