i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Randomize