I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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