found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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