I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize
