Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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