you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
