SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I'm getting married
To pizza
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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