I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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