Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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