I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
