Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
