Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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