I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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