You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
