i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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