He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
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