How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
