wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
