You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Randomize