sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize