whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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