the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
So here I am, sexting at work.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
