I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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