haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
