I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
only if we run a train.
done.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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