I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
